Sweet sweet boy, you are HERE! You are tiny and floppy and magical and so unbelievably handsome. I am completely, 100% smitten. Being a girl and having a girl first, I had no idea if I would truly connect with a boy as much as I did with Elsie. Oh my how I love how wrong that fear was the minute you were laid on my chest, sweetheart.
Let’s start the night before your birthday…
Philip and I were talking about being induced the next morning and all of a sudden, confused as to why we were really inducing labor at only 4 days past the due date. I was 4 days late with Elsie when my water broke, and yet she was born 6 days after the due date, so 4 days didn’t seem so bad. We figured some reasons were that due to the complicated labor with Elsie, our doctor liked having a more controlled day with starting antibiotics and getting the day rolling according to our timeline. Also, our doctor had a much higher likelihood of delivering me if we went into the hospital on Friday morning since she didn’t work until the next Tuesday. We decided we would pray for a sign either way and if they didn’t call us in to be induced by 12:00 pm on Friday, we would just postpone the induction till the next week so that we could hopefully go into labor naturally.
At exactly 6:00 am on the morning of Friday, January 13th we got the call. We didn’t expect a call until 8:00 am at the earliest, so we jumped out of bed and thanked God for a clear sign this was mean’t to be your birthday. The woman on the phone asked for me and then said “Are you ready to have a baby today?”. My heart filled with a million emotions, excitement, terror and just overall emotions of being my last morning with Elsie as our only baby. We scurried around the house, typical that we weren’t 100% ready to get out the door and gathered everything we needed (yet somehow, forgetting the carseat!). The last thing I did was pick up Elsie from her crib when she woke up and gave her a huge hug. I cried and cried singing to her the night before so I figured this would be another burst of tears before I left. But Elsie, with her joyful spirit, left me only with a huge smile on my face. I told her “Your baby brother is coming today!” and she jumped in my arms with a HUGE giggle and reached down to tickle my belly squealing! I could do nothing but smile with ease about the day to come.
We got to the hospital at 7:30 am, after a slight detour when your dad missed the exit to the hospital due me screaming about some amazing news from a very special person about a very special new little person she had inside her belly. The hospital actually was funny, the nurses acted confused as to why we were there and had us sit by ourselves for about 5 minutes waiting to be helped. We giggled quietly/nervously until a nurse finally came to take us back to the triage room. Once in triage, they let us know the rooms they did have for us were now full, but they were opening up some more in 30 mins to an hour. So I got set up for antibiotics with an incredible IV that didn’t come with any pain- praise Jesus! I swear, this “IV Queen” of a nurse started the day of your birthday with such a relief, since I really wanted to rip out my IV for all of the 42 hours of Elsie’s labor. My doctor also came to see us in the triage room, which was so very comforting and yet another confirmation that being induced was a good idea. I loved having our doctor in the know about the day and being able to check in on us throughout the whole time!
Around 10:00 am we were taken to our delivery room by a nurse named Catherine. She was fantastic and calm and a mama herself, so we instantly loved her. They began giving me pitocin around 11:00/11:30 am and from there we waited. I was having contractions even prior to the pitocin, but nothing enough to really create change or kick labor into full gear. During this time, we asked to speak to an anesthesiologist about an epidural and my reaction to it from last labor. The doctor listened to my story, immediately said “Yep, I know what happened, someone give me a pen and paper”. She drew a diagram of the spine and explained in lamens terms all about how the spine and epidural work. At the point of naming what happened to my eye with Elsie, I touched her arm and warned her “Ok, now I need to cry” and started balling. She was the only doctor until this point who did not think my reaction was a medical mystery. I had so much peace about it and her confidence in the absolute finite change it would happen again gave me confidence I could get it again with this labor. At 1:00 pm, when my Dr, Dr. McKeever, came to break my water. She checked my cervix to see how far dilated I was and then stuck a small little tool up and popped my water. Philip, my curious cat of a husband, watched very up close and personal and said it looked like someone turned on a faucet full blast! Suddenly I was sitting in a hot tub of amniotic fluid and was quite surprised by the mass of water. It was both disgusting and amazing at the same time. When my doctor left, she was still quite positive you’d be born in the next few hours and she would be able to deliver for me, so she went back to the office until my cervix was at a 10.
This is when my contractions started really kicking into full gear. Philip helped me through the start of them, by pressing his thumbs into my lower back. I decided to hop into the tub to experience how much water helped with contractions too, so that was calming and helpful to pass the few hours as my body got further along. Once the contractions really started to feel painful in the tub, Philip and I talked about the fact that if I am getting an epidural, there really was no reason to delay since I had already started pitocin. As I was stepping out of the bath, the contractions and shakes went into full steam and I was so glad I decided to call for the epidural when I did! I got the full shakes and had chattering teeth for the next few hours. The anesthesiologist who came at around 5:00 pm was not the same woman doctor who helped me in the afternoon, but he assured me again that it was very very rare reaction and he too knew of a very few other cases who had stroke like symptoms to the epidural. There was a resident doctor with him who started to begin the process and even though I felt mean, I asked the nurse Catherine, to actually have the seasoned doctor take over since I was so very nervous to get the epidural at all. He was very accepting and moved aside for the older more experienced doctor to take over. Once I had the epidural, I laid down in 20 minutes, wouldn’t you guess… had a similar arm/eye droop reaction like I did with Elsie! The doctor came in and took the level of the epidural down to a “6” instead of a 10 and my eye slowly improved over a few hours. The doctor didn’t even do the epidural block dose, just did the spinal tap (lingo?) and I still had the reaction. They assumed that I am just super sensitive to the epidural and I have a tiny window where the medication can go without affecting my eye, so turning it down did help a lot.
After the epidural, I just wanted to sleep off the weird stroke eye feeling and so we sat for a few hours with me sleeping and resting before the big show. Philip rubbed my hair and comforted me until I was sleeping, then he slept a bit and Nana updated the family and time just kind of slowed down for a bit.
As the night went on, we kept asking the nurse when she would check my cervix again. She casually said to wait until I felt pressure like I needed to poop. So when I said there was pressure, she said, but just during contractions or all the time? And since it was just during contractions, she decided not to check since I had the group b strep bacteria diagnosis. Finally, around 7:45/8, I said… “Okay, I think I am feeling pressure” and she decided to check really just to satisfy my curiousity, but didnt think I was ready to push. Once she checked me she immediately kicked into full gear and said “UM! OK! Well, you are DEFINITELY a 10 and the head is RIGHT there so I need to go get the doctor!”. Philip jumped up and my mom started scurrying around the room as we were all so nervous that we would be pushing so soon! The doctor came back within about 10 minutes and got everyone ready for the big show. This doctor was named Dr. De La Torre and was a doctor we had met previously in appointments, one who was super buff and was interested in working for PATH. The nurses and the doctor were very confident that this baby would be here in a matter of minutes, he was so low. I however, knew my body well and said “No no, I think it’ll be a while. I have a very small vagina”. Her response was “Well, that’s something no man has ever complained about!” ha.
Once I began pushing, the whole day slowed down and I just soaked in every minute. With the epidural window leaving my hip with feeling contractions, I knew when each one would come. As I tended to push with my shoulders and legs, she broke out my legs by having my hold my ankles and push my knees out like ‘happy baby’ yoga pose. This really helped me with my contractions and getting more focused on where to push. At 9:00 pm, she said “Are you a competitve person” and I replied “YES!” And she said, “Ok, lets get this baby out by 9:15!” Well.. 9:15 came and went but soon I was able to reach down and feel your head coming out! I felt it three times and each one was more and more motivating. When Gabe’s head finally came out all the way, my mom started crying happy tears and I knew the end was upon us! The doctor pulled Philip by her side and together they wiggled out Gabe’s shoulders and then Philip took his body and pulled him all the way out of my body! It was AMAZING and I got to see the whole thing, since I focused on opening my eyes to enjoy this birth.
Once Gabe was on my chest, I felt so at peace and actually said “Ok, I could totally do that again!”. I loved seeing his little face and hearing his sounds. Watching his skin turn from a purplish tone to pink and beautiful was such a gift. The LIFE pouring out of him was such a miracle.
Gabe, thank you for taking it easy on your mama, all 7 lbs 15.9 ounces of you. You captured my heart instantely and wiped away all my fears I had about if I knew how to love a baby boy.
Oh boy, how I LOVE you deeply, sweetheart.
anchors, swings and alleyways 